It's not really that ironic, though, is it? When I really think about it, I can see clearly how it is Satan who used these tools against me in order to prevent me from writing against the things he uses to stop us from doing good works!
The fact of the matter is that life is frustrating and disappointing a lot of the times. Maybe this is on my heart right now because it's the holiday season, which is supposed to be joyful and beautiful but tends, instead, to be challenging and sad. Or maybe it's because I've been reading the book of Job, which is a book that focuses a lot on frustrations and disappointments. I remember one time I heard a speaker say (I don't remember who, sorry!) that the thing that makes the book of Job such a frustrating book to read is the very first verse of the entire book, which says, "In the land of Uz there was a blameless and upright man named Job, who feared God and avoided evil." If only Job was a bad guy! How easy it would be to sit there and point fingers and say that he deserved all of the things that happened to him. But that's not the case. Bad things happen to good people, and that's the frustrating part of life.
I'd say that, overall, I'm a pretty "good" person, whatever that means. I sometimes feel a lot like Job, even though I didn't lose everything that I owned. I also wasn't blameless in the eyes of the Lord. I guess it's a big leap to compare myself to Job. But I have a problem, that I don't really know what a name for it is. I guess I'd call it a "Spirit of Annoyance," although someone will probably tell me why that is theologically incorrect. However, that's the only phrase that I can think of to describe myself. I get annoyed really easily. Too easily. It's annoying how often I get annoyed. I get annoyed at other people, but I also get annoyed at myself.
These feelings can be sinful, but they usually start in a good place. When I am feeling these negative emotions, I can usually identify the reason why: I crave the good. Anything good. If I am feeling frustrated with something in my life, it's usually because I can see that there is a good in my life that isn't being fulfilled. When I am frustrated with my singleness, I can see that it is a result of the fact that I am called to be a wife and a mother, and that those things are good, and that my calling hasn't been fulfilled yet. My call to those things is a good thing, and that good thing is missing in my life. Or, when someone criticizes me, especially when I've done something good and "deserve" to be praised or rewarded, I get really disappointed. Why? Because recognition of my good works IS a good thing, because it's recognizing the good that God has put in me! That's not wrong!
Like all things in our lives, we can either use them to glorify God or to glorify something other than God (like ourselves). Scripture says that "We know that all things work for good for those who love God, who are called according to his purpose" (Romans 8:28). Notice that it does NOT say that "Everything happens for a reason." God does not create bad things in our lives. Ever. Those things are a result of sin. But God does let bad things become good things when we turn them into good things.
Think back to the story of Joseph, way back in the Book of Genesis. Joseph had every reason in the world to be frustrated. His own brothers plotted to kill him. Rather than killing him, they decided to sell him into slavery. Joseph made the best out of that situation, only to be framed for a crime he did not do, and be put into jail. While in jail, he made the best of the situation and helped a man who failed to acknowledge or help him for years afterwards. Finally, the man remembered Joseph, went to Pharaoh, said what good things Joseph had done, and Joseph was finally released. His name was finally cleared, and he finally recieved the honor that was due to him. When Joseph's brothers ask him for help (not knowing who Joseph is), Joseph reveals himself to them and says this: "God, therefore, sent me on ahead of you to ensure for you a remnant on earth and to save your lives in an extraordinary deliverance. So it was not really you but God who had me come here; and he has made me a father to Pharaoh, lord of all his household, and ruler over the whole land of Egypt" (Genesis 45:7-8). Later on, Joseph says, "Even though you meant harm to me, God meant it for good, to achieve this present end, the survival of many people. So now, do not fear. I will provide for you and for your children" (Genesis 50:20-21). God has the power to take the disappointments in our lives and turn them into great things, good things! If only we are good and trust in Him.
The biggest thing to remember about Joseph's story is that he never stopped being good. In all of the accounts of Joseph, we never see him do anything evil, foolish, or disobedient. He doesn't let emotions get in the way of his holiness. And God rewards that for him. Trust that God has a plan for you. Ask Him what His plan is. And surely He will show you how to give Him glory through it all.
Prayer: Lord, I am feeling frustrated and disappointed right now, especially with _________________. Please give me comfort. Please show me how I can glorify you through this situation. I know that you are good and would only give me good. If there is anything that I can do to bring about a positive change, please open my eyes to it. I believe that you will help me. Thank you.
Questions for reflection:
- What are you frustrated with in your life right now? How can you use that thing to give glory to God?
- What are you disappointed with in your life right now? How can you use that thing to give glory to God?
- Do you see how these things are a result of the fact that there is a good missing in your life? How can you let God replace that good?
- What scripture stories are helpful to you, to give you hope when you are feeling down? Maybe one of the ones mentioned here: Job, Joseph? Maybe there are others: Infertility stories like Sarah, Hannah or Elizabeth, or stories of sick people who have suffered for long times, or even Mary who watches her son die on the cross. These types of stories are all over Scripture.
